I just feel like I really need to defend this episode, since there seems to be a general consensus through the fandom that this is one of the worst episodes. And, I mean, fine, it's not wow-worthy or anything, but I can think of worse episodes than this one. Yes, there are bits to it that are seriously flawed, but on the whole, I genuinely enjoy it, and I gon tell you why.
First of all, it's Xander-centric. And while it's nowhere near my favourite Xander-centric episode - oh no, that award can go to The Zeppo, or The Replacement, they're wonderful and fantastic in every way - I just have a soft spot for the guy. I relate with him on a deep level. So, yeah, that fact by itself automatically means that I'm going to be easier on this episode. Did you really expect an objective, unbiased review? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahahahaha....
No, but seriously though. When I first watched this, before I was so invested in Xander and the gang, I still was entertained by it. If I had found it to be nearly as bad as everyone says it is, then I probably would have stopped watching the show then and there, and where would I be now?
I'm just going to go ahead and sum it up for y'all. Basically, we meet this wonderful teacher who believes Buffy is more than her delinquent reputation, and our hearts get all warm and fuzzy for a moment. Then whoops, he gets murdered by a mysterious monster. The next day, a substitute teacher by name of Ms. French comes to school, and for some inscrutable reason, all the guys are enthralled with her. It's like, every testosterone based teenager in the school is hot for that particular teacher. Including, of course, Xander. Things are not all what they seem, as we soon realize when Buffy chases a vampire - a supposedly very dangerous vampire, with Freddy Krueger hands, who the Scooby Gang dubbed the intimidating name of "Fork Guy" - long story short, Fork Guy is scared of Ms. French for unknown reasons. Which is super weird. So when Ms. French starts picking out guys in the class to help her with a science fair project, including Xander, the rest of the gang starts getting kind of apprehensive about it. Then, when Buffy tries to warn Xander, he gets defensive and decides rather foolishly that she was just jealous that someone was showing an interest in him. Ms. French invites him to her house. Turns out - yeah, sorry, this part's kinda gross - but, turns out, she's a giant praying mantis who can morph herself into a pretty lady. She preys on young virgin men to, um, fertilize her eggs, and then, as is the habit of the praying mantis, she beheads them after the... fertilizing. Eugh.
Now, I am not blind to all the flaws of this episode. The Monster of the Week, the she-mantis, well, it reeks of plot holes, and all-too-convenient sequences of events, and basically every lazy writing trick that they could pull. The plot for Fork Guy was pretty half-assed, the whole concept for the she-mantis is really creepy - I'm still kinda trying to get over the part where young, explicitly virgin men get raped by giant praying mantises - and, possibly the most irritating part of the whole thing, that cliffhanger at the end has absolutely no payoff or callback ever.
No, I think we can agree that I am not blind to the flaws of this episode. It's just, I have no problem with overlooking them for the sake of the entertainment value of this episode. And I find that to be plenty.
I love the development of Xander in this episode. That daydream at the beginning of the episode was pretty great. Buffy's the damsel in distress, Xander dusts a vamp attacking her, promises to kiss her like she's never been kissed before, then goes onstage and rocks a guitar solo. Fantasy ruined when Buffy wakes him up mid science class to stop him from drooling. When he gets to the Bronze later, he tries to act cool and ends up getting rejected repeatedly in the midst of a few minutes. I feel for the guy, I really do. It's not easy to be in that place. So, yeah, I totally get it when he likes having the right kind of attention put on him by someone who's apparently so desirable to all the right people. And yeah, I totally get it when he blows up at Buffy. I mean, for god's sake, she's wearing Angel's jacket while telling him that his hot-for-teacher teacher is actually a giant bug. It's completely idiotic of him to blow up like he did, I'm neither denying nor doubting that, but nevertheless, I see where it comes from. A lot of it comes from the fact that, just in case this wasn't totally clear before, Xander's quite an emotional creature.
What I find interesting is when it seems like he's finally going to get the thing that would give him status and leverage to all those people, and he ultimately decides not to do it. Because he loves Buffy. Cheesy? Totally. Sweet? Undoubtedly. But of course, by that point he'd been thoroughly roofied, so he passes out and doesn't really get a choice in the matter anyways. But hey, it's the thought that counts, right?
There's also the smaller theme of the influence the teacher had on Buffy. The good one, the one who was murdered before Ms. French took over. He believed in Buffy, and so, since he saw the potential in her to be the brain, she saw the potential in herself as well, and she uses that to find all the information, or "factoids", that led them to rescuing Xander from giant-bug-babe. It's a small thing, but it's there.
Then there's the other theme, a generally mixed message, about virginity. 'Cause they must have had a reason that the she-mantis only targeted virgins. So...... abstinence... leads to death by bug-beast? Hmm.... there is much confusion over the high school=hell metaphor in this instance, but I may have uncovered something, so bear with me.
What if this episode isn't meant to be a PSA about the importance of abstinence? What if it's more about the ridiculous weight teenagers place on virginity, and whether or not you've got it. Xander was especially eager to work with Ms. French because he'd been more or less told by his schoolmates recently that in order to have any kind of status, he'd have to get some "action". So, if he hadn't placed such importance on gettin' dat "action", he would have theoretically been far less vulnerable to the bug-beast, right? (She's actually called the she-mantis, but I like bug-beast because alliteration). I realize it's a stretch, but that seems to make more sense to me than, um, predatory teachers who prey on young virginal men = bad.
What I'm saying is, I don't think the writers care about whether or not teenagers have sex, and that wasn't really the point - I mean, Buffy loses her virginity in grade eleven (though that backlashes pretty badly), and Xander and Willow lose it in grade twelve (not together), so that doesn't seem to be a concern. I think it has more to do with, the writers think that teenagers make the virginity into this huge, undesirable thing, when that isn't what it should be about at all.
This is my theory, and I'm sticking to it.
I still like this episode. We've got some good Xander development, as mentioned. And yeah, okay, the Monster of the Week being a giant bug was pretty goofy as a premise, but there are still parts to the execution of it that creep me out. Like when Ms. French senses Buffy watching her, and turns her head 180 degrees to look at her. That still gives me shivers. Which is good. My thing is, if something makes you feel an emotion, that's good. Apathy is the worst thing you can feel while reading or watching a story. Even if you don't like what you're seeing, I mean, that's better than total indifference.
So anyways.
But that cliffhanger though.
The thing about Buffy is that the continuity is, like, A+. There is rarely a thread left untied. But there is a major thread left majorly untied in this episode, and that is the foreboding ending shot on bug-beast eggs cracking open.
What happens to the baby bug-beasts? No one knows.
Look, as far as actual entertainment value goes, I'm glad they didn't have a follow-up. I can appreciate this episode as a one-shot, but it's a one-shot. It wouldn't be possible to rehash this concept in a way that seemed fresh. The story was played out.
But in terms of the standards we have for Buffy, it's irritating. We may be used to having episodes that have a twist at the very end, or a cliffhanger, or whatever, but it's extremely rare to have an episode that ends like that and not deal with the loose ends at some point, and so therefore it's strange and irritating.
I like that we get some satisfaction at the end of the episode, where the guy who was bugging (pun not intended) Xander all the time about not having sex was also targeted by the she-mantis, and so was therefore also a virgin. That made me grin on behalf of Xander, who wasn't quite in a grinning mood at the time as he hacked the she-mantis eggs to bits and pieces with an ax. Have I mentioned that Xander's quite an emotional creature? By the way, for me this is a throw-forward to when, after Buffy has defeated the Master but is traumatised by the experience, she crushes his bones to smithereens with a hammer. So much pent up rage at the monster that tortured them. Or, in Buffy's case, killed them. I love it.
Also, Willow's adorable.
Willow: (In reference to Xander and the mean kid both being virgins) I don't think it's bad, I think it's really... sweet. And it's certainly nothing I'll ever bring up again.
I wish Fork Guy had actually been a thing that had gotten more air-time, though. He acts as a plot device to show Ms. French isn't human, and then to lead them against his will to Ms. French, and then Buffy stakes him. Off-screen, no less. Personally, I'd like to have seen that fight. Not that that's the point. I just think they could have done more with Fork Guy. Also, Freddy Krueger vampire is scared of a bug? Kind of a wuss.
Can we please talk about how Buffy knew that Ms. French was a praying mantis?
Buffy: Factoid one, only the praying mantis can rotate its head like that. Factoid two, a pretty whacked-out vampire is scared to death of her. Factoid three, her fashion sense screams predator.
Willow: It's the shoulder pads.
Buffy: Exactly.
Cordelia dealing with her "trauma" is pretty hilarious as well. She starts congratulating herself because she hadn't been able to eat for a while since she saw Dr. Gregory's dead body, and she lost some weight. Then she quickly amends that and says she doesn't think they should kill a teacher everyday so that she loses weight. You have no idea how much I appreciate Cordelia.
I think that's all I've got, so what does the Buffy Virgin say about this episode?
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| Boringbeanz=David Boreanaz, who played Angel, just in case that takes some figuring out. |
Sidebar: Angel was snarkier and more fun at this point, and I wish they'd kept it that way. Because, knowing how that turns out later, just UGH.
This is all I've got for you today. Thank you for joining me in my attempted defense and also general review of this episode. Bottom line: it's lazy and goofy, but also strangely charming and kind of adorable. I enjoy it. So take that.
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